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“I Think Moms Feel Like They Have to Be Perfect.” Nicki Minaj Shared Her “Fear and Anxiety” After Becoming a Mom

The popular 40-year-old singer Nicki Minaj, described as one of the greatest female rappers of her generation, recently spoke candidly about the fears and anxiety she started feeling after the birth of her first child, as well as feelings of guilt about leaving the baby when she goes to work.

In December 2018, the pop star started dating her childhood friend Kenneth Petty, and the following October they got married.

Shortly after the wedding, Minaj announced her intention to take a well-deserved break to fully focus on her family. “I’ve decided to retire & have my family. I know you guys are happy now. To my fans, keep reppin me, do it til da death of me ... Love you for LIFE,” she wrote on Twitter.

In spring 2020, to her fans’ surprise, the singer suddenly stopped actively posting photos to Instagram. In July, she shared glamorous shots of herself showing off her baby bump. That’s when her fans found out that Minaj was pregnant and had been for quite a while.

On the 30th of September 2020, the 37-year-old singer became a mom for the first time. Nicki had a boy, whom the parents jokingly call “Papa Bear.” Here’s what Minaj wrote the first time she posted a photo of her son, “Papa Bear, thank you so very much for choosing me to be your mama. Becoming a mom is by far the most fulfilling job I’ve ever taken on. Sending love to all the superhero mothers out there.”

Maternal feelings have become very evident in the singer. Nicki shared that her heart breaks every time she has to go off to work. According to her confession, she has been getting increasingly anxious since becoming a mom.

“I’m very attached to my son. I remember being in the U.K. and just bawling. And when I try to FaceTime him, I get more sad. So, I try to hold out on FaceTiming him because to then put the phone down is so difficult,” she said.

Nicki said her 2-year-old never had a nanny because the singer wants to do everything herself. This has led to the pop star’s fear and anxiety about finding a balance between parenthood and her fast-paced, ever-developing career.

Minaj says that as a woman from Trinidad, she is culturally not used to nannies and strangers looking after children. And she thinks there’s nothing wrong with moms taking care of their kids alongside nannies. “It’s just that I have to get conditioned. I have to get it out of my mind that it’s a weird thing because there are tons of celebrities that are doing it, and they’re raising amazing children,” she said.

The singer candidly shared that she was initially surprised at how her anxiety crept up on her: “I think moms feel like they have to be perfect. I hate that I have more anxiety now because you’re like, ’What if the one time I leave my child, I get that phone call?’”

Incidentally, the new mom called other mothers “superheroes” at the time that she was experiencing pain from breastfeeding, as from the outside everything looks easy. “But breastfeeding is very painful. Pumping is too. Women make this stuff look way too easy. Moms are really superheroes,” said the singer.

And even though, since the arrival of her son, the singer is experiencing more different anxieties and worries about him, she still wants to have more children, and “she would feel guilty if she didn’t give Papa Bear another sibling or two.”

What feelings did you experience in the first years of your child’s life? Did you have excessive anxiety or worry?

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