How Our First Impression Forms, and Why It May Be Wrong

From an early age, we are taught not to judge a book by its cover, and at the same time, we hear about the importance of an impression. On the internet, there are a lot of recommendations on how to influence the opinion of other people, how to behave when you meet someone for the first time, what to say, and what clothes to wear. No matter how hard we try to follow these recommendations, for some reason, they don’t always work.

Why we rely on a first impression.

Evolution has formed our brain in a way to assess as fast as possible whether a stranger can be dangerous to us or useful.

From the very childhood, we’re fascinated by people’s faces, and throughout our lives, we can store an incredible number of faces in our memories. There’s a separate region of the brain, responsible for storing the data, and the images of animals and inanimate objects are stored in a different region.

How fast it’s formed.

To make a first impression, we need fractions of a second, and all the following information only confirms it. This is why if someone doesn’t like our appearance or the way we move, it is almost impossible to change these feelings with a well-planned conversation or logical arguments.

We tend to ascribe behaviors of others to their inherent traits or (in)competence but tend to associate our own behaviors more with external circumstances and the environment. If someone interviewing for a job stumbles and spills tea, the interviewer will think they are clumsy. And the interviewee will blame the slippery floor or the cup.

The importance of eye contact.

From an early age, we learn to understand people’s feelings and intentions by the expression of their eyes. When people make eye contact, it causes a distortion in our temporal perception: time seems shorter than it really is.

Direct eye contact is very important for the first impression. According to studies, if we see someone looking directly at us, we study them more carefully and memorize their face better.

Why people in dark glasses seem more attractive.

When people’s eyes are covered by sunglasses, we trust them less. At the same time, many men and women wearing such an accessory, seem more attractive to us. According to psychologists, the right glasses make our faces look more symmetrical, resulting in a better impression. Besides, dark glasses are an accessory many celebrities wear. This is why strangers like to see people in glasses.

What influences a first impression.

We only need milliseconds to make an opinion about someone we don’t know, based on their face. It’s formed automatically, and these conclusions should tell us if the person is a powerful person or someone we can control, and whether they are approachable or not. The brain just summarizes the facial features and expressions to give us the conclusion as fast as possible.

If a person is smiling, we assume they are happy, so they are more trustworthy. If it seems a person is angry, we start to worry. A big chin makes people look powerful, so they may be potentially dangerous. People with big eyes, small noses, and chins, make us trust them and think they are a little naive.

We estimate even the smallest details of clothes.

Not only the face but the entire image is scanned within seconds. So, comfortable and practical shoes tell us a person is easy to negotiate with. Stylish shoes are an indicator of success, and new clean shoes indicate a person is anxious.

In a very short period of time, people can even estimate the quality of clothes. According to a study, men quickly understand whether clothes were bought off-the-rack or tailor-made. The participants of the experiment had only 5 seconds to look at a photo of a stranger and make an impression based on their clothes. If the suit fits well, the person seemed more successful, confident, and wealthy.

Making an impression on someone we don’t see.

We don’t have to meet someone to form an impression of them. Even a phone conversation can give us an impression, and we only need 12 seconds.

A lot depends on the voice pitch. People with low and deep voices seem more attractive, intelligent, and honest. Scientists think that it’s because of evolution. Men would scare competitors with their deep voices and attract potential partners.

We evaluate people based on smell.

Some smells affect how we perceive people. Scientists at the Le Moyne College in Syracuse, N.Y, did a study and found that the smell of onion is associated with men and the smell of lemon — with women. So, a sandwich you eat for lunch, or lemonade you drank, may actually influence how your business meeting or job interview will go. A different experiment showed that floral smell makes people happy and can be used to manipulate people’s moods.

How correctly we estimate the impressions we make.

When we try to make a good impression, we carefully plan our every word, and we demonstrate our good intentions, but we don’t even notice if people like us or not. Scientists found that most people are so fixated on trying to make people like them that they don’t notice the signals that it works.

This is why we sometimes don’t develop the relationships that could actually work out, and we lose potential friends. People doubt their own attractiveness until they get concrete proof.

Can a first impression be changed?

The first impression matters a lot when we built a trusting relationship. If we feel we can rely on a person, despite all of their future mistakes, we’ll still believe that they are reliable. However, over time, the influence of a first impression fades, and people can reestimate their friends and business partners.

A study by scientists from the University of New Hampshire showed that first impressions can be changed. If a new partner didn’t seem very trustworthy at first, but their future actions made a lot of good, the trust became stronger.

Have you ever had situations in your life when your first impression of someone was completely wrong?