Cheery
Cheery

Why Do Men Also Get Reminded That “The Clock Is Ticking?” Even Celebrities Haven’t Escaped This Fate

Many young men who don’t yet have a family or children often get questioned about their personal lives and about when they will finally settle down. An example of how society nonchalantly hints that when approaching 40 it’s time to become a father, can be seen in the conversation between journalists and the star of one of the Spider-Man films, Andrew Garfield.

What Garfield said to the reporters

Invision / Associated Press / East News

The actor doesn’t normally discuss the details of his personal life. It’s only known that in 2011 he started dating Emma Stone, his co-star in The Amazing Spider-Man. And since 2021, he’s been attributed a relationship with model Alyssa Miller.

But during one of his interviews, Garfield couldn’t hold back anymore and said that he feels serious social pressure due to the fact that he neither has a family, nor children on the threshold of his 40s. According to him, he has even started to feel guilty about it.

Yes, he once thought he would be the first among his friends to become a husband and father. According to the actor, it would have been much easier at 40 to be free of social “obligations” and to let the grown-up children join adulthood. Nevertheless, he decided to take a different path.

Now Garfield is just curious to see what happens next. He’s not going to rush things or let himself be pressured by those who love to meddle in his personal business.

How other celebrities react to questions about becoming a father

Reynaud Julien / APS-Medias / ABACA / Abaca / East News

35-year-old Zac Efron hasn’t been spared comments about the “ticking clock”, either. On a TV show, the actor talked about the filming of the movie Firestarter and mentioned that his character has a 10-year-old daughter. The host almost immediately followed up with a question about whether Zack was ready to have children of his own.

“Oof,” was all Efron could say in reply. But after a short pause, he did say that he’s already tried his hand at the role of a father, albeit only on-screen, and realized that he was not yet ready for the complexities of parenthood. At the same time, the actor took the opportunity to express his love for his mother and thank her for everything she’s done for him.

Now, on his Instagram, Zac Efron periodically uploads photos of himself with his brothers and little sister Olivia, whom he enjoys babysitting. But the actor is in no hurry to have his own kids, clearly aware of the responsibility this entails.

Another actor who is regularly pestered with questions about children is Jared Leto. At 45 years old, he clearly told the press that due to his busy schedule, he will not be able to devote enough time to family.

According to the celebrity, he gets so deeply immersed in working on each of his roles that he cannot think about anything else. And children do need constant care and attention.

What arguments are usually made by supporters of early parenthood

Celebrities are not the only ones who feel this pressure. Many childless men in their late 30s also find themselves under society’s scrutiny and wonder if, by this point, it might be too late for them to get married and have children.

Perhaps it’s because they’re too often faced with similar questions from relatives and acquaintances, who “caringly” warn of possible problems with conception and the risks of having a child with special needs.

Men are being made aware of the fact that the quality of their reproductive material deteriorates considerably with age. But at the same time, a number of experts state that the chances of having a healthy baby remain quite high, and people should not be discouraged from having children at a later age than usual.

What the men themselves say about this

Quora users sincerely believe that there is no law that says men aged 40 and over cannot start a family. The main thing is, by this age, to understand the scope of responsibility they have to take on. After all, once a child is born, there will be many different issues to deal with, including paying for health insurance for the new member of the family and creating the perfect conditions for the child to live in comfort, allowing them to develop properly.

My first child was born when I was 42, and I’m loving life and both of my kids, and wouldn’t have it any other way. For me, doing it any sooner would’ve been a mistake. I would’ve messed up big-time and the kids would’ve suffered for my lack. I’m glad I waited, and I’m a much better dad now than I could have been when I was younger. I had too much of my own baggage to sort out to go adding kids to the mix.

There are times when, due to a lack of support from loved ones, men no longer expect to find family happiness after the age of 40. This is when it’s important to find someone who can help you believe in yourself and start your life by turning over a new leaf.

He was 45. I was 31 and had waited to find a wonderful man to have a family with. We decided to adopt. I mentioned it while my dad was visiting and my hubby’s mom was there. He happened to be out of the room. His mother promptly told me he was too old to be a father. I directly told her that she better never say such a thing to him because he had lived years of sadness and this was a chance for him to have the family he wanted. We ended up planning to stop at 4 children but adopted 8. It was the most fun I’ve ever had raising them. Hubby doesn’t regret it for a moment.

Are children bothered by the fact that their fathers are not as young as those of their peers?

You can find evidence online that a child usually doesn’t care how old their parents are. What matters is that they feel truly loved and understood. And some children openly say that they found it more interesting to spend time with a wise father, who has already achieved a lot in life.

My father was 50 when I was born and 52 when my sister arrived. Mum is a lot younger, so she is still about and makes for a pretty fabulous grandma. Dad was with us until he was 79. Given his age when I was born, he had a lot of life experience, had a network of friends around the world and was financially secure. This meant we had a very rich and fulfilling childhood even if we did not play a great deal of rugby together. We travelled the world together. He worked for us.

Some people may regret that they didn’t have children or that they had them too late. But it’s still a decision best made independently without relying on the opinion of others. After all, there are many childless couples in the age group of “around 40,” and the number is increasing every year while societal pressure on them is gradually decreasing.

Do you think people should only have children in their younger years or is it better to have kids at a more mature age?

Preview photo credit Invision / Associated Press / East News, Reynaud Julien / APS-Medias / ABACA / Abaca / East News
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